Be Byronic

I’ve gained two new followers today, bringing me up to 180 total. Suzanne thinks my blog is doing great. I dunno; I just post whatever’s on my mind. It doesn’t follow any set patterns or rules. It’s a potpourri all about me. I hope Lisa replies soon, but she has family in Santa Rosa, where the wildfires are now. She’ll be worried about that. I don’t really like her husband very much since the trailer fiasco. He’s been morbidly curious about it a couple of times. I see Lisa as a separate entity from him, regardless of their marriage. People are merely primates anyway, however we may exalt ourselves. We are baboons with religions, polluting the planet with our crap. I gather that ISIS is still up to the same old tricks. Screws are loose in their heads. I’m not a scientist, but I subscribe to its findings. Kate was right: I was nuts to join a church. It was just a convenient way to make friends, but on the price of what I know. Church, like AA, is free of charge and widely available— for better or worse. Beggars can’t be choosers, they say, but it’s a shame that people are misinformed at the lower strata of society. “We all know that crap is king / Eat your dirty laundry.” God makes people feel good, I guess, but the implausible is hard to stake your life on. If you let go and let God, you have a 50:50 chance of a good result. That’s no better than random. If you want better outcomes, then you need to navigate your ship. Be a Lord Byron with your life. Have the balls to go for what you want while you have the opportunity. Don’t end up having regrets for what you didn’t do. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Go for all the marbles when it really counts. Never say die, and when that time comes, die fighting.

An Old Yes Album

Quarter of midnight 🕛. Slept for four hours. Aesop is giving me the eye 👁. He probably wants to go outside, but I’m putting him off for a while. With the pressure off me a little, the terrible schizophrenic thoughts have died down. I had been thinking that doomsday was near, my own demise imminent. I don’t feel very creative with words right now. I was validated for my music today, and that’s what I’m inclined to keep doing. Playing music with someone else who is good feels a lot better than one hand tapping a smartphone. For a bass player, drummers are the best to jam with…

Accomplishing something today was worth a little pain of anxiety. Of course the world didn’t come to an end. Fear is unreasoning, but the heart says stick it out, and the original word for courage also means heart ❤️. It seems to me the heart is more rational than the mind. When the mind fails me, I ignore it and listen to my heartbeat. If the heart alone did the thinking, good things would get done. It would be our first step toward a better way of living. “As long as we see there’s only us who can change it, only us to rearrange it at the start of a new kind of day.” “Soon we’ll be as he proclaimed in a new way of living. Take the things you need in life but remember the giving.” Both of these songs are on Time and a Word, one of my favorite Yes albums. Listen to it to be eternally young!