Quarter after six.
At some point today I want to pick up my Snapple empties and bag them. This is grunt work that I hate, but I’m lucky that my life is not drudgery like that of many people, including my family. They have an antipathy for books and everything intellectual, despising what they don’t understand. This Christmas Eve for me is like another Thanksgiving, and the thing I’m grateful for is being the smart person I am. There’s an old cliché that goes like this: Which would you rather be, dumb and happy or smart and sad? It’s the same as saying that ignorance is bliss. But I think I disagree. Intellectual work is a lot more pleasant than manual labor, and overall, the life of the mind is a wonderful thing. So today I’ll make a start on the Snapple bottles and bless every moment I get to spend using my brain. Another thing. As students in junior high school, my friends and I used to play chess in the library. Often, a bully would come along and knock all the pieces over from sheer incomprehension and resentment. It was a symbolic scene that still goes on in the present day at some level. What can we offer the bullies now except a little music to soothe their feelings? Meanwhile I move on to celebrate the beautiful things in my life.
robgradens 
I find it very curious that I see many here on WordPress that have hundreds ( and in one case thousands ) of followers and yet they all get very very few “likes” and almost zero comments. But anyway, tomorrow can be a sad day at times. You are sensitive to the natural elements around you so I invite you to take a solitary walk with me in the mist and drizzle and soak up the cosmic blessings that we are given at no charge excepting the tithe of being alive. About that bully- that could have been me at times. Now I live in Hell remembering my crimes. So when you are next in church say a prayer for him. Providence may allow him to change for the better.
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And on the other hand, guilt can be a useless emotion that just sits there with nowhere to go. If I were you I’d let myself off the hook, especially if it’s been years that you’ve done penance. Some people believe that it’s righteous to feel depressed and to get down on themselves, but I’m not one of them. If there’s a god, I think he wants us to feel happy, and to spread happiness around. It’s only practical to be happy. I agree with utilitarianism and John Stuart Mill. If you do feel guilty, how long do you plan to keep beating yourself up? Doubtless other people absolve you, so why not forgive yourself?
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