Allamistakeo

Eleven o’clock.

I feel great this morning, perhaps because I learned that my stimulus payment is coming this Wednesday. Dunno; I just feel different today. Not at all interested in Easter tomorrow. I have band practice this afternoon at four o’clock. Looking forward to that. I’m giving Ron one of my Ezra Pound books to repay him for two taxi rides. I might take along a Rush CD as well. A little while ago I was writing in my blank book about my rejection of metaphysics, which means religion and even Platonic idealism. I don’t buy any of that stuff now, and my detour to religion four years ago was mostly a mistake motivated by the political scene. I’m not sure how all of that works. Was Hegel right about the dialectical process of history? We move to the left and we move to the right and back again.

I feel as if I’d come out of a trance that lasted four years. And my views on schizophrenia are strictly biological once again, because hopefully the world is changing its mind also. Life is all very chicken or the egg, mind and matter, phenomenology and physics. I’ve had enough of psychology for a long while and look forward to a more realistic existence. I used to believe that maybe talk therapy could cure a mental illness like schizophrenia. But after several years of this, I’ve seen no progress as far as the delusions and hallucinations. So we just take the medication and live our lives as we can. To a great extent I feel relieved to see the changes round about me. Some people will be disgruntled for the next term, yet we all have to surf the waves as they come. For today, anyway, I’m pretty happy. 

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