A superstition makes me stop and think of how I have suffered for my sanity. Was it pride that caused me to fall? Whom am I to thank for the development of Vraylar? With my addiction and my psychosis for many years, I was at an all time low. Today I have been raised up to optimal mental health. Perhaps life is just a series of ups and downs without moral cause and effect, but the superstition believes something different. It says that the penalty for hubris is taking a fall, even a very great one. The religious instinct demands a moral rationale for everything that happens to us. The tragedies that befall us must have a reason for being. We are not satisfied with physical causation, but must have moral purpose. So we believe in karma and retribution, in reward and punishment for our deeds and misdeeds. Life makes no sense to us without the moral order. Then again I think of Kate, my positivist friend. I don’t know what she would say to these arguments. According to Carnap, morality cannot be empirically verified. It doesn’t stand to logical analysis. I wish I could remember our conversations by email so long ago. My interest in positivism was only in order to justify more drinking. But since my church attendance, I absolutely have a moral interpretation of life and events. To deny the existence of moral rules is to thwart one’s conscience.

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